Monday, October 22, 2007

Jesus Effing Christ!



Double Feature Program Bill


It's Amazing! It's Stupendous! It's Spectaculariffic! It's the Double Bubble Toil and Trouble Duality of Man in one easy to swallow pill! It's the Jesus Double Shot! Hey you (yes you!) bring the kids, bring the neighbors, bring the extended family (just don't bring any gays, atheists or liberal freethinkers) to JESUS CAMP! Your host, renowned insane asylum escapee Becky Fischer, will lead you through the mesmerizing, sanctifying and terrifying tangled web of non-reason that is Jesus Camp. You will learn that "children are so usable in Christianity." That's right, they're "usable." Holy Jesus P. God! She's going to make them into Christian soldiers who will march onward to reclaim America for Christ. I bet you didn't even know it belonged to him. You'll learn from brainwashed campers that some churches are "dead churches" (those would be the non-crazy ones) and that God doesn't necessarily visit them. You see, "depending on how they invite him, he'll be there, or not." Betcha didn't know that either! You'll be amazed as you discover that fuzzy yarn collector George W. Bush "has really brought some real credibility to the Christian faith" And Ted Hagard (absolutely no skeletons in his closet, NONE!) informs us, "If the evangelicals vote, they determine the election." If you liked the terrifying journey into the darkest reaches of humanity that was Deliverance you'll love Jesus Camp (only it's a LOT SCARIER!).

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE!!!

The gays, atheists and liberal freethinkers you had to sneak in the back door are now more than welcome for the bottom half of the bill, THE GOD WHO WASN'T THERE! Best send the first group home though or they are not going to be happy Jesus campers for long. Your host, sane, logical, rationale Brian Fleming, will show you some of those same crazy types from the first movie, only this time we get to laugh at them! Brian does bad, awful mean things like use EVIDENCE, DEDUCTIVE REASONING, LOGIC and INTELLECT to make a strong case that... hang on to your hats... Jesus never even existed! Holy Crap! Then what the hell's that camp all about? You'll hear distinguished professor Robert Price say, "There are other similar savior figures in the same neighborhood at the same time in history: Mithras, Attis, Adonis, Osiris, Tammuz, and so forth, and nobody thinks these characters are anything but mythical. And their stories are so similar, most of them, in fact, having some kind of resurrection or another, sometimes even with celebrations after three days and so forth, that it just seems like special pleading to say, "Oh, well, in this one case, it really happened." BLASPHEMY!!! Oh I know somebody who's going to be firing up the George Foreman for Satan in Hell. His name starts with a Robert. Oh my!

It's splendorfully filled wonderment! It's the Now You See Him, Now You Don't Double Bill of Mythical Fun! Come one, come all! Praise be to Mithra! It's Jesus Effing Christ as you've never seen him before, and according to Brian, no, you haven't ever seen him before. It's The Jesus Double Shot!

DON'T MISS IT!!!


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And now for a moment of seriousness: I found both of these documentaries fascinating to watch but obviously walked away with profoundly different feelings. The evangelicals of Jesus Camp are abhorrent human beings who brainwash children into believing that homosexuality, liberalism ("liberalism is dead!") and freedom of thought are evil things. They home school their children and actually teach them that, "science has never proved anything" and that "creationism is the only thing that provides the real answers." The Becky Fischer who runs the camp is a study in demonism. She is bereft of insight, self-reflection or logical thought. She possesses exactly zero critical thinking skills. I found this camp and these adults horrifying to every moral instinct I possess. And I felt immeasurably sad for the brainwashed, indoctrinated children. One of them early on expresses disbelief in parts of the Bible and in the existence of God. He is clearly an intelligent child who could become a productive, free-thinking member of society. By the end he is indoctrinated into their cult and it made me want to cry. I sincerely hope that the spark of reason he displayed early on will stay with him and re-ignite itself before it's too late.

As for The God Who Wasn't There it is a cheaply made documentary using video for most of the production and coming in at a scant 43 minutes. The production values may be low but the content is rich. Fleming does occasionally go overboard with his assertions and belabors some of his points on Jesus' non-existence but it is a powerful personal diary of a film. You see, Brian Fleming was a born-again Christian who had an intellectual awakening. The last ten minutes of the film are riveting as Brian visits the evangelical fundamentalist school that taught him that to deny the Holy Spirit would mean an eternity in Hell. He interviews the Principal of the school who becomes testy and walks out on the interview once Brian begins asking hard questions about indoctrinating children into mythology when they are too young to make up their own minds. He asks the Principal how moral is it to frighten children into believing they will be eternally punished for denying the existence of a spirit they cannot see or feel. The principal leaves after threatening to sue if any of the footage is shown, which of course it is, and no lawsuit followed. We are then brought to the climax, and it is one that moved me. Brian and his cameraman walk into the Chapel where Brian relates stories of sermons that filled him with fear and reminds us once again that they were taught what Jesus said in the Bible, that if any man denies the Holy Spirit he will spend an eternity in Hell. Brian then turns to the camera and says, "I deny the Holy Spirit." The end.

See them together. With running times of less than 90 minutes for Jesus Camp and 43 minutes for The God Who Wasn't There you can see both in less than two and a half hours. Jesus Camp lets you know the dangers that await this nation if it does not awaken from its slumber and The God Who Wasn't There reassures us that even the most rigidly indoctrinated can awaken from their nightmare and allow the truth to seep in through the cracks. And surely we've all got two and a half hours to spare for that.

This has been a part of the Double-Bill-a-thon hosted by Broken Projector.


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